I’m not sure just how long I was asleep in my bed, when I heard the sound of Monica and Jet coming in through the front door, when a bright light from the living room lamp flickered on and seeped, through my cracked bedroom door. I could see what appeared to be a suitcase in Jet’s hands. I briefly sighed, rolled over and tried to get back to sleep when a strange feeling of jealously hit me.
He looked good, even better than I had remembered as the t shirt he wore, fit him nicely. Whatever he had in that suitcase must be heavy has it had a way of bulging out his tanned muscles. I can taste him again, and feel the strength in his fingertips has he pulled my hair back that night. The way his lips were soft yet firm on my mouth I begin to yearn for as I lay there remeniscing.
If only I would have stayed that night around the camp fire, perhaps things might be different. Maybe I would be the one, laughing and giggling and cuddling up to him every night. What is wrong with me? Why do I insist on being so distant from everyone? Haven’t I learned anything from the old people I take care of? Life is short and I know it. Perhaps I need to let go of the idea that every one will eventually leave me.
As I get up and pull on my jeans to go to the bathroom, I attempt to forgive myself. If only dad was here, and my brother Joe. Funny how even mom crosses my mind. I was her only girl and instead of letting her dress me up in dresses, I hated her for it.
As I head on into the bathroom in the hallway, Monica quickly grabs my attention.
“Hey Savanah?” “Do you think you could help us out tomorrow and use your truck to get the rest of Jet’s stuff?” Monica asked with a smile.
Before I can answer, Jets steps into the conversation.
“My brother is coming in from California tomorrow to help, but he won’t have a truck or anything, our grandparents usually pick him up from the airport in Wentsworth.”
I give Jet a quick nod yes, and go about into the bathroom. Zipping up my pants I open the door, and continue with, “You two can borrow my truck, but I have to work tomorrow, so it will be afterwards.”
“Thanks Savanah, your a life saver, “ Monica replies.
I close my bedroom door, with a smile, barely looking at the two of them snuggled up on the couch. Filled with so many mixed emotions, I try to shake it off. Once again, Monica never looked so happy has she does tonight. I should be grateful I guess.
Grasping onto my pillow, I give it one quick squeeze, as a small tear starts to find its way down my cheek. It could have been me. I could have been happy in love. Instead I’m laying here in my bed alone, again.
I look over at the time, and its only 10:30 pm. Geeze. This is a long night already. I better get some sleep. I hear the sound of faint giggles, and close my eyes.
Morning comes sooner than expected. With my alarm blazing, I reach over and hit the button. I do not want to get up and I find myself forcefully moving my legs out from underneath the covers. Their is a sense of chill in the air. I guess fall is really here.
I notice the house is empty as Monica works the early shift at the diner. As for Jet, I do not know what it is he does. I never asked, and quite frankly its none of my business. As long as he pays his share of the bills thats what will matter. Perhaps my rent will go down, and I can finally afford some time off and go visit my brothers that I have been missing.
I make my usual oatmeal with raisins and put a lot of cinnamon in it. For some reason the smell of it, isn’t quite as appeasing as it is usually. I eat it anyway as my stomach begins to growl and beg for some.
I grab a jacket and the truck keys and my phone begins to ring. I notice its the nursing home.
“Savanah? This is Marjorie from work, do you think you could work a double shift today, Tonya has already called in, I guess she has the Corona virus, so we need you?”
“What, how did she get that? We haven’t seen much of it here.”
Before I can continue, Marjorie buts into my thoughts and conversation.
“I know dear, but she’s thinking she got it while she was visiting her family last week.”
“Oh okay, well sure, no problem.” I replied. I hang up the phone, and take a drag off my cigarette, as I’m waiting for truck to warm. I quickly realize now, that I will be unable to help Monica and Jet move has I had promised last night. I guess I will stop off at the diner before work and let Monica know.
As I pull into the drive at the diner I notice Jet sipping some coffee through one of the windows. So this is where he is. As I head on into the diner I notice Monica is busy with some costomers.
“Jet?” I quietly say with a brief smile.
“Why goodmorning Savanah, its a pleasure seeing you here this morning.” Jet returns the smile.
“I was just letting you two know, that I have to stay after work today and work a double shift so I wont be able to help with the move.” As I pull back on my hair, “I do have a spare key to my truck, and I can just leave it with you so you two can still use it, just be sure and bring the truck back so I can get back home. Is that okay?” as I try to hide my hands from fidgetting.
“Yes, Savanah, that will be great, thank you. “ Jet replies while he takes another sip from his coffee.
I lay the key on the table and take a quick turn out of the diner. I can see from the distance the obvious confusion on Monica’s face, but I hurridly have to go in order to not be late for work.
You see, that wasn’t so bad, I tell myself. Everything is going to be just fine. “Just fine.” I mutter to myself, as I drive away.
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