As I laid in bed last night listening to the sounds of my husbands moaning from being so sore from working, fear arose. To make matters worse, when his alarm went off this morning, he asked for my assistance to help him get out of bed. His sore achy muscles have been screaming since late afternoon yesterday, due to him hanging some heavy doors on his current project. Flashes of what are we going to do if he gets hurt, become more vivid than ever. Are we prepared if something does?
How many people in this world, are truly prepared for the unknown? How many people were truly prepared for Covid, and all the natural disasters? How do we embrace our lives for what could happen to our well being, our health, our finances, our minds? How do we prevent ourselves from living in constant fear? It cannot be, that we just focus on this moment, this day, for we must also prepare ourselves for tomorrow.
What aspects of our lives can we truly control? Just ourselves? I never dreamed that when I was in my late 30’s that my back would suffer immensely and that I would need emergency surgery. I wasn’t prepared. My oldest son, being the healthiest of all at just 21 years old, with his physical fitness regiments, non smoking, perfect weight, would end up in ICU with a blood sugar so high that now he is a full blown diabetic. He wasn’t prepared. How do we prepare ourselves for life’s snowballs?
I do not have all the answers, but one thing that does come to mind, is our minds, the ability to cope. It is important that we do not give up, throw in the towel, call it quits. We keep moving, we take necessarily steps to move forward, no matter how difficult it may be. For we must prepare ourselves to survive. We must train our minds, that life will throw us obstacles, but we must learn to cope and deal with whatever that might be.
Living in fear, is not comforting. It is not something I wish to do to myself. For with living in fear comes the consequences of the stresses that it puts on our health, our hearts, our blood pressure, our bones. We need to focus on survival, yes, but we must also focus on what is good in our lives, and in this world, if we are to ever bring ourselves to some kind of balance.
Life to me, is like a game of chess, and how we plan our next move, our current move, will lead to our ultimate destination. I want to live. I want to know, that despite myself, I can survive. I don’t want to lay on the couch and predict my ultimate demise, waste away, and throw away my time here on this Earth.
I WANT TO LIVE!
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